People dislike you… don’t bother!

A statement by Winston Churchill goes like this, “You have enemies? Good. That means that you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life.” But I think the issue here is, because they can’t stand up to you. They feel inferior to you, and they are intimidated by that, and then intimidated by you, and don’t want to admit to that. So it is easy to hate, than to learn and grow.

Various types of people envy you and it is for their own insecure reasons. They know they cannot be you; they are envious of your proximity with their loved ones; they worry about the closeness with common friends; they worry about being replaced; they worry about ‘what will people say’, and myriad of such silly reasons. Simple. They just feel they cannot match up to you. You be yourself. You continue to lift up those who want to and whom you can.

Someone once told me, that seeing me and my attitude, made them want to be a Christian. That is surprising coming from a community that is fanatical about religion. But it is not Christianity that made me what I am. I just am. I think my parents instilled some values in me, and I was told to be humble. Though this comes across like a very pompous statement. IMHO.

Remember, whoever is trying to bring you down, is already below you!

So do the good you can, and leave the rest. Karma catches up.

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15 Cell phone attitudes

I know this topic has been beaten to death.. but here are some more…

  1. You call them, they are on another line; they don’t call back…
  2. When they are with you they insist on answering every call or message they get.
  3. They are on Viber, Whatsapp, SMS, BBM, whatever… all the time… and I mean ALL.
  4. If you happen to miss their calls, and call back later, they won’t answer.
  5. One responds to calls only, not messages.
  6. One will never call, or answer your calls, but will Whatsapp or SMS you.
  7. The same one will message a reply after 2 hours, but will expect you to answer in 10 seconds or less and if you answer later than 5 minutes, you are a b!tch.
  8. One does not read SMS, Whatsapp messages… “Too many, too much trouble to read.”
  9. Another one will reply on SMS/Whatsapp if you call, “too much trouble to talk.”
  10. Another does not feel the need to answer if the phone is far away… it’s too much work. But will not bother to call back. “Too much work, too many missed calls, yaar.”
  11. Another one does not respond to my connections, (email, SMS, calls), but will speak sweetly when on a conference call.
  12. Then there is one who will be irritated if you don’t answer right away, but will not bother to reply to my missed connections. “Oh I was busy… but why are you not answering, you can’t be that busy, you are mean.”
  13. And some will send a template message, ‘Busy, will call later’… later is usually forgotten; some an apology days later.
  14. Then there are some who say “battery is very low, will call you later”. We had gifted them a phone bank.
  15. Oh, I forgot of the ones, who will take your call, and whisper, “I will call you back”. We are still waiting.

Thank goodness for those friends who will answer your calls, and messages, and missed calls, and call back promptly!

And I guess I am not getting the ‘message’ from the others.

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On the 30th of November, I went for a Classical concert, (mostly Christmas carols) and then to the Celebrate Bandra Kitsch Mandi, a mini fair of sorts, with some more singing, contemporary this time. Foot tapping, we kicked off our heels and danced on the grass. Sometimes it is just great to have girl company, nope… better. It really got me soothed and rejuvenated. Ended up with some good Moghlai food, (of course food) and I was at peace with myself. I felt ready to take on December, a month that usually is very contemplative (read depressive) for me.

I think what did it was the music. So it is official, I am a Beast! Music hath charms to soothe the savage beast…

Have a great December 2014.

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Happy Endings.

Sometimes, I watch movies, with my brain left outside the theatre. Leave the analyses and laugh along. The Bollywood flick, Happy Ending, is a film that ensures you do just that. I watched the film, just to see if it really meant ‘happy ending’ and for fodder for the blog. Yes, I am that way sometimes.

What the world interprets of ‘happy ending’, as Indians, we don’t talk of it, or are supposed to know of it! Yet we are a population of 1.2 billion and counting. And we gave you the Kamasutra!

I know of someone with long distance girlfriend, and she attempts at, what urban dictionary would call, booty blocking, but men will be men; and booty blocking or not, they will have a happy ending. Another married one has a long term paramour and gets what he doesn’t get at home. A separated couple does it as a need.

Happy endings are thriving and are of rage. I mean whatever happened to just pure friendships. Now it is all about ‘getting it’ or actually ‘friends with benefits’. And there is also a new word for it, ‘xxxx buddy’, rhymes with duck.

So is it all about getting what you want, when you want it. Is a happy ending the end of desire, or the beginning of happiness? Or is happiness a state of mind. Are happiness and comfort the same? Or are we choosing what we feel and how we want to feel? Are we aware of our feelings? Or are we dependent on physical attributes. Physical versus emotional, where would our happiness lie? Or does happiness lie? What is the truth?

And yes the film has a happy ending, in more ways than one. Leave your brains out…

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Reply to ‘On Beards’

After the post ‘On Beards’, a friend called me and said it was flat. And nothing around me should be flat! He said I should have made it like a 50 shades note. So here goes. The post on Beards was inspired by you, Mr. Shark. I have always seen you clean shaved, and never envisaged of you in a beard. But then women don’t undress men visually. And we are very selective in person too.

So when I saw that pic of you in a beard. I was impressed by what I saw. And you know I’m not impressed easily. That beard, shiny, silky, smooth, straggly to a fault; that hint of a smile, the lips full and pink, like an apple waiting to be eaten; the cheeks strong and rosy like a cherry, reflecting the glow of the sun. All healthy; all international actor quality. That shiny rich fuzz, was unlike my non-existing hair, so it was enchanting. And I wanted to run my fingers through that silken field of trimmed grass, and caress it like a visually challenged person, and play with it, and do all that and more… And this is a ‘safe’ site, so if you want NSFW blogs, read my other one.

Is this enough of a 50 Shades for you?

PS: I have no intention of meeting you at all. We haven’t met in about 8 years, and I surely don’t want to break the spell. You are officially my phone friend. And of course, now I am too chicken to meet you. The Hindi term is more succinct – gxxx fxxxx.

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The body beautiful.

A thing on breasts, I know it is ‘when you have it, flaunt it’; but don’t force it. Cleavages should be subtle. You have a bust – generous or petite – it is evolution, don’t shove it into the limelight. It/they will be noticed anyway. You don’t need a discerning eye to see breasts. Just don’t make them sartorially obvious.

Even babies notice them, and it has been scientifically proved. And babies also try to cop a feel. If the baby’s mom is not endowed, then it is the kid’s way of saying to you ‘what the hell is that’; if their mom is generous, then it is like ‘cool, this feels like home.’ I know of a baby who wouldn’t go to women who were not endowed like his mom. So yes, discrimination begins early. Very early. Mammilla rules!

Celebrating the female form has been commemorated through the ages. India first. Ajanta & Ellora, Khajuraho, Kamasutra of course! Or just go to any temple or ancient sculpture site and view the gravity-defying globes. Art is Beautiful. (Ya Ya I know. I am straight.)

But on the flip side, look at the super models. Not only they are unhealthily skinny, but they are also, what we used to say in college, carom boards, or Man-chester.

While it may be all ‘about that bass, ‘bout that bass’, J. Lo made it popular. Someone called it extra ‘cushion for the pushin’. But Nicki Minaj in Anaconda made it extremely gross. BTW has anyone ‘heard’ the song? I know we have seen it, but anyone remember the tune? Then Kim Kardashian breaks the internet with her butt! I don’t like big butts and I cannot lie. Even if Ross and Rachel’s kid does like them.

I’m glad I have a flat @r$e, even if after the doc gives me an injection it is sore for hours. Or sitting on a hard bench for long the butt hurts. Excuse me, we are princesses like that. Our gluteus maximus and gluteus medius are delicate, while the pectoralis major, glandular and subcutaneous tissue is well… diminishing actually!

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My sartorial sense

My dear fashion designer friend hates polka dots. ‘It’s for children. It is gross on adults.’ Hey, Marilyn Monroe and Audrey Hepburn made polka dots iconic. But that is a different story. I like polka dots. It may not justify my age. But like I read somewhere; ‘I can’t act my age, I have never been here before.’ I now need a yellow polka dot outfit to complete my basic polka color collection. And no, it won’t be an ‘itsy bitsy yellow polka dot bikini’. Or could it? No! still not ready for a beach two-piece.

So from my likes to my sartorial dislikes. It is oft touted that heavy women should wear ‘V’ necks. I hate ‘V’ necks. I think it is just rude to force a cleavage to subvert a heavy chest. It is there, everyone will notice it. Most of the heavy women I know look spectacular in wide round necks. For that matter, they look even stunning in cowl necks, contrary to popular opinion.

From necks to sleeves. I dislike drop shoulders that mimic sleeves. Also mutton sleeves, unless you are in a period costume production. And I also don’t like sleeves that mimic mutton sleeves.

Sleeves to dresses. Can’t seem to like kaftan dresses. Also, if the back of a dress has to have a V or open, it better be deep, not a measly one. Deep! Show them backs!

And saree blouses have to be deep at the back. And sarees have to be worn a little below the navel; with the pallu drape just below the calf.

And I can’t wear animal prints, on clothes or shoes or bags.

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